deep_red_bells | [MS] November topic

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[MS] November topic

In the morning I wake up >> And in the night I sleep >> Since the day that I was born >> Repeat, repeat, repeat

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[E-mail sent to everyone on Baileigh's mailing list]

It's cloudy today. It's supposed to rain tomorrow. It's funny how you can enjoy rain when you're not thinking to yourself "Oh, crap, I gotta go out and slay in this mess." Cause right now the only thing I'm worried about is "Crap, Ru, you're gonna go outside and get filthy, aren't you?" I have never been quite so grateful for Slayer strength as I was the first time I had to wrestle that dog into the bathtub.

I would really like for people to stop saying they'd back Sarah Palin to run for president in 2012. I just...do you listen to the woman? Really. I'm all about girl power but have you heard a word the woman's said? She does not need to be president. She does not need to be anywhere near the White House. She does not even need to look at it too long, her stupid might be catching and the current president can't afford to be made any stupider for the brief amount of time he's got left in office.

I would also really like for the commercials for mouse traps to go away. They don't need to be advertised. Why would they need to be advertised? People will always need mousetraps. They wig me out.

I have officially painted every room in the house except for the kitchen and the bathrooms, which have wallpaper. I am so not messing with that crap, it's too much of a pain.

The house smells like fresh paint. Am breaking out the frilly candles to try and get rid of it. It's not the worst scent in the world or anything, but it smells really artificial, not nice and homey.

I have a sneaky suspicion I'm not Ruhun's favorite anymore. He keeps giving me looks like "Why, why did you take me away from the house full of people that slipped me treats? Why did you take me away from the hot babe I was so gonna do? Why, you evil woman, why?!" Giving him treats seems to be helping. He likes the dehydrated liver treats. I hate liver. It smells awful.

I've slept more in the past 2 weeks than I have in the past 2 years.

I miss you guys.

I don't think this is helping.

--B

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You could always come home. No one will think any less of you. And I'm not sure I'm supposed to be telling you this--or if it's any of my business--but I know you're missed.

-- Sylar

I know that. And it's not--I'm not afraid of what people think of me.

I guess I'm not sure where home is anymore.

--B

Heh. Where the heart is? Sorry. That was probably in bad tastes.

But, you still care about Sark, don't you?

-- Sylar

Edited 2008-11-13 00:57 (UTC)

No, no it's not. Not in bad taste, I mean.

I do, more than anything else in the world. Not to get terribly mushy on you, but, yes.

--B

It doesn't bother me. You being sentimental. Mostly because I know what that feels like.

And as surprising as this may sound? New York is my home--I grew up here--but I'd leave, if Suresh wanted to go somewhere else. I came across the country for him. I won't lose him now.

I'm just waiting for Sark to do the same.

-- Sylar

I'm sorry.

--B

... for what?

-- Sylar

I don't know. I wasn't trying to take him away from his friends.

--B

I wasn't trying to say that you were.

-- Sylar

I know. I'm sorry. I think that came out wrong.

--B

It's alright. And I'm sorry. If I upset you.

-- Sylar

Oh, no, you didn't. Believe it or not, real relationships are still a puzzle to me. I had...one. Before this. When I was very young and particularly vulnerable, so I'm still trying to figure things out. I have a fear of turning into one of those clinging, annoying girls that demands constant attention--I hate those girls.

I appreciate you listening, really, I do.

--B

This is your second real relationship; mine with Suresh is my first. Or it is if we have the same definition of 'real'. So, I understand your fear, but I can also say that I doubt you'll end up one of those girls. That's not who we are. Either of us.

You're welcome.

-- Sylar

Real meaning...real? Like...intimate, I guess? One that you can't walk away from easily? One that'll leave a mark? And thank you. I appreciate that.

--B

Mm. First real one, then. But again, you're welcome.

-- Sylar

(ooc: So. How hardcore does he fail at comforting people? lol)

Terrifying, isn't it?

--B

It is. Half the time, I feel like I have no idea what I'm doing, and the other half, I feel like I'm going to wake up and find this was all some kind of elaborate dream. Or that he'll leave. Or that one of these days, I won't be able to control myself, and I'll end up killing him. Or that someone else will.

And it's almost funny. If this were anything else, anyone else, I wouldn't be bothering. I don't deal well with fear--anyone who knows me knows that. But at the same time, I can't leave. I couldn't do that to him. Or to myself.

-- Sylar

(ooc: Hee. Aw! He's like, "I have no idea what I'm doing. :D! And why the hell am I telling her all this?")

I understand all of those fears. Well, maybe not the killing him bit, but for the longest I was afraid of hurting him. It took me a very long time to get my strength under control and I wasn't sure how...well, how it would go.

It's hard to shake, that constant worry and fear of if and when the rug is going to be yanked out from under you.

--B

It is, yes. But I won't lose him. I'm too stubborn. And I get the feeling that both you and Sark are the same.

May I ask you something? Off topic?

-- Sylar

(ooc: Hee! And now Sylar is denying being candid with her. He's all like, "Yeah, I'm telling the truth, but it's so she'll realize that Sark misses her.")

Stubborn is certainly a good word for me.

Of course, always.

--B

How strong are you, exactly?

-- Sylar

(ooc: lol. She needs to stop calling him sweet, or he'll have to, like, go kick puppies for a week to restore his badass image.)

I haven't had to test my limits yet, to be honest. So far, there hasn't been anything I can't lift, kick down or break if I had to. Summers made a remark once about being able to bench-press a Buick. I don't know if she was joking or not.

--B

Huh. That's interesting.

-- Sylar

And handy! There's not a jar I can't open and moving the furniture's a breeze.

--B

Oh, trust me, I know.

-- Sylar

Oh, I'm sure you do.

--B

Maybe we should start a moving company.

-- Sylar

No one could get it done quicker, I bet. We'd kick ass at construction, too.

--B

We probably would. We could make a fortune.

-- Sylar

We'll have to remember that if we're ever hard up for money.

--B

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[MS] November topic

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