[email to Cain fear_noevil]

[deep_red_bells]

Cain,

So I'm pregnant.

I mean, I haven't had it confirmed by a physician, but with all the signs and symptoms adding up very quickly and two tests coming up positive, I'm pretty much going ahead and assuming it's a definite. I've already picked up some prenatal vitamins, sworn off the alcohol (which, hi, you have no idea how tempting THAT was), and am weening myself off of the caffeine. That's going to be a slow and difficult process because I RUN on it, but I'm doing it. Yes, I've read a book, try not to act surprised. And if by some weird stroke of luck happenstance I'm not pregnant, it's better to be safe than sorry.

Here's the thing, though. These books are written for normal women. I'm not what you'd call entirely normal. I have no clue what's going on in this freakshow of a body of mine. I have no idea what might happen. Obviously Slayers are physically capable of having kids: Nikki Wood had Robin, and there was at least one other Slayer I've dreamt about that had a child, which I'm trying not to think about, because it didn't end well for her or her kid, but anyway. Maybe there'll be nothing unusual at all. Maybe it'd be perfectly safe to find a good OBGYN in the phone book and book an appointment. And maybe it wouldn't be. So, guess what, you're stuck with me as a patient, because you know the most about our physiology, and you're the only person that I can trust with absolute certainty not to call The Enquirer if some weird Bella Swan thing goes down. I seriously seriously doubt that it will, but I'm not taking any chances.

So. There you go. I've already e-mailed Ethan and asked him to send you a copy of Nikki's Watcher's diary, if he's got it, and to get it from the Council library if he doesn't.

Hope you're well, and all.

--B

Comments

[fear-noevil.livejournal.com]

Bee,

To be honest, I won't trust anyone BUT me to treat you, so you're stuck with me either way. I know a bit about Nikki Wood, but I'll re-read the diary. Right away, along with the vitamins I want you adding more protein to your diet and calcium supplements. Good call on the booze and caffeine, obviously.

I want you to download the PDF on this email and print it out. It's a referral to Dr. Mark Salinger, he's one of the best OB/GYN's on the East Coast and one of my mother's old foster kids. Book an appointment, give him my name and the note, he'll do the official pregnancy test. He's a good man, you can trust him 'till I roll into town.

No bullshit on that count, I'm coming out there to take care of you. To be fair, I been planning to come out that way anyhow, this just gives me an excuse to do it sooner rather than later. I'm getting a little sick of being away from my kid, and with her leaving the Slaying gig I think it's time maybe we both settled down together again. I've been seriously considering moving back home, either get my old job back or see about getting a teaching gig somewhere. Going back home is a big step, lotta bad memories...still, I could always find work in New York or Jersey or something. Anyway, I'll be spending a fuck of a lot more time in New York now, so deal with it.

Finally, Bee? You got my sincerest congratulations. I know you're terrified, and I know that the man's probably not taking this real well. He will, though...when it sinks in what this is, he'll warm up to it. You and him are a good thing, the best thing, and that thing created life. For the rest of his or her life, and yours, that kid's gonna represent just how big the two of you are.

If you're gonna do anything for you and that baby? Be happy. It's okay.

I'll call you when I know when I'm flying in...don't tell Hank, I'm gonna surprise her.

Love ya,
Cain

[deep-red-bells.livejournal.com]

Cain,

All right. I'll do my best. I haven't had much of an appetite lately--everything smells wrong. But I'll do my best.

I'll give his office a call and see when I can get in.

That's fine. Like I said, I don't know if I could trust another doctor.

To be honest, at this point, I don't feel much of anything.

Hank will like that.

--B